Kissing

Otters kissing (2)

Kissing can increase your life expectancy by up to 5 years! Plus as an added bonus it will increase elasticity in the face making you look even younger.

 

 

Kissing rabbits (2)

Kissing for one minute burns 26 calories, but passionately kissing someone for the same amount of time can burn an incredible 74 calories!

 

 

Kissing giraffes 1 (2) Kissing uses only one muscle, called the orbicularis oris that is responsible for puckering your lips when you go in for the kiss. The science of this act of kissing itself is called philematology.

 

So, if you want to live longer and  burn some calories, pucker your lips.

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Connie Taxdal

2014 Golden Heart® Finalist

 

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Published and Unpublished Authors’ Contest

This is off my usual subjects, but there’s a great contest for published and unpublished authors if you’re interested. Here are the details.

****Permission to forward to loops and social media sites granted and greatly appreciated. **** Gear up to submit your polished chapter for a chance of getting in front of our awesome line up of final editor judges. (See below)

100% Electronic contest. Fee: $25.00 (U.S. funds) per entry.

Deadline: Entries must be received via upload at www.tararwa.com by May 1st, 2014. Deadline will not be extended.

Contents: The first 4,500 words of a qualifying manuscript (actual word count). First and subsequent chapters up to the maximum entry word count of 4,500 words. *Word count will be verified. Note: No synopsis required in the preliminary round.

Eligibility requirements: The TARA Contest is open to unpublished and published authors of novel length fiction; however, the entry must be the author ’s original work, unpublished and not contracted as of the time of the contest deadline. No entry can have been previously published in any format (on author’s website visible to the public, self-published, ebook, mass market, etc.) Manuscripts that have previously won the TARA Contest may not be reentered. Past TARA winners are eligible to enter a manuscript that has not previously won the TARA Award. (***Complete eligibility rules can be found at www.tararwa.com.)

Final editors Category Romance — Karen Reid – Harlequin Historical — Kerri Buckley — Carina Press Inspirational — Raela Schoenherr — Bethany House Publishers Paranormal — Leis Pederson — The Berkley Publishing Group Romantic Suspense — Amanda Bergeron — Harper Collins Contemporary Single Title — Sue Grimshaw — Penguin/Random House Women’s Fiction — Katherine Pelz — The Berkley Publishing Group

A complete set of rules can be found at www.tararwa.com E-Mail questions to: TARAContest@tararwa.com or TARAContest@gmail.com

If you are a published or unpublished author, this is a great contest to enter.

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Thank you,

Connie Taxdal

The Secret to a Happy Marriage

Here’s one solution for the secret to a happy marriage.

THE SHOEBOX

The day they were married, the wife cautioned her husband never to open or ask her about the shoe box she had placed on the top shelf of their closet.

For over sixty years or marriage, they shared everything and kept no secrets from one another. The husband never thought about the box until, one day, the little old woman became sick with cancer and the doctor said she was dying.

The wife told her husband it was time he should know what was in the box and asked him to get it from the closet and bring it to her bedside. When he opened the lid, he found two crocheted dolls and a stack of money totaling $95,000. He was dumbfounded and asked her about the contents.

crochet dolls

Click on picture for free patterns.
‘Shelly’ girl doll
‘Bryan’ boy doll

“When we were to be married,” she said, “my grandmother told me the secret of a happy marriage was to never argue. She told me if I ever got angry with you, I should just keep quiet and crochet a doll.”

The husband was so moved he fought back tears. Since there were two precious dolls were in the box, she’d only been angry with him twice in all those years of living and loving.

“Honey, that explains the doll,” he said, bursting with happiness, “but where did all this money come from?”

“Oh, that’s the money I made from selling the dolls.”

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Connie Taxdal

What’s on “Your” Organ?

Miss Beatrice, the church organist, was in her eighties and had never been married. She was admired for sweetness and kindness to all.

One afternoon the pastor came to call on her and she showed him into her quaint sitting room. She invited him to have a seat while she prepared tea. As he sat, the young minister noticed a cut-glass bowl sitting on top of her old pump organ. The bowl was filled with water. In the water floated, of all things, a condom! condom

When she returned with tea and scones, they began to chat. The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him and he could no longer resist.

“Miss Beatrice, I wonder if you would tell me about this.” he said, pointing to the bowl.

“Oh, yes” she replied, “isn’t it wonderful? I was walking through the park a few months ago and I found this little package on the ground. The directions said to place it on the organ, keep it wet and that it would prevent the spread of disease. Do you know I haven’t had the flu all winter!”

Connie Taxdal

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True Love

4After nearly 50 years of marriage, a couple was lying in bed one evening when the wife felt her husband begin to massage her in ways he hadn’t done in quite some time.

It almost tickled as his fingers caressed her neck and then her shoulders. His hand moved down her side to the small of her back and over her stomach. He slowly worked his way lower, passing gently over her buttock and down her leg to her calf. Then, he proceeded up her inner thigh, stopping just at the uppermost portion of her leg. He continued in the same manner on her right side.

She had become quite aroused by his caressing when he suddenly rolled over and became silent.

“Honey that was wonderful. Why did you stop?” she asked in a loving voice.

To which he responded: “I found the remote.”

Connie Taxdal